HELLO, I'VE MOVED.

www.-mexicanwine.blogspot.com

Your grace has found me just as I am ,
Empty handed but alive in Your hands ;

Dear diary,

Today had been a day of praise, a day when God did his first miracle in my life.

The teacher came, it was the second period. I stared on as she entered, the words came shook my entire world. " No appeals would be accepted, and that is final. "

The third period came, and the fourth, next. My mind was a complete blank, I thought of how I'm gonna explain this whole issue to my parents, I thought of how my future's gonna be now that such an important subject had been taken away from me.

And I thought of God. I came to Him after I received the letter, I was required to drop A-Maths. I prayed, and prayed hard. He seemed to just say, don't worry, don't worry. Just like how He had answered all my prayers whenever I seek for help. Though everything always didn't turn out how I wanted, I had faith still.

Then came today. I just questioned Him, over and over again. I wanted an answer, but all that came was silence. I kept asking, where were You when I needed you so much, when I had so much faith. Are You gonna leave me just like that ? I wondered if You had even heard my prayers. My faith just faded away, into nothingness.

Recess came and passed. Humanities followed soon after. But it was not the humanities teacher that stepped in first, it was my maths teacher. She came to retreive her water bottle she had left behind, and the sight of her made me more depressed. That was, till she stopped. In her tracks and she said, " Only hansheng is allowed to continue in his A-Maths among all appeals. "

I stood there, stunned. I shouted " Yayeee ! ", and jumped for joy and hugged everyone.

And I thanked God silently, from the bottom of my heart. And I could see a gentle smile, and that was all to it.

Here I am,

Humbled by your Majesty.

Coverd by Your grace so free.

So it came, my first miracle God has done in my life, my very first prayer He answered. I just know, now that I've been so much closer to Him, it's just impossible not to see the things He has been doing in my life. I came to him in the past, only when I've played too much, and needed miracle results. But God sees our faith, and God answers it accordingly.

And here I am, thanking God. I can hear him speaking through my heart, and when my faith disappeared, He had shown me a miracle, He had granted me another chance. As if to say, hansheng, have faith always, and I'll always be there for you. (:

And now I've found,

The greatest love of all in mine.

Thank you, God.

We live on front porches and swing life away,

We get by just fine here on minimum wage.

If love's a labour I'll slave till the end,

I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand.

The new year, 2006. (:

The past year hadn't exactly been a good year. I'd be lying if I say my results had been impressive. Truth is, I hadn't been working hard in my studies, and I've pretty much wasted the entire year away, just having fun outside. Family relationships hadn't worked out too well, but I'm grateful for that little peace that still exists in that little corner of the house. It's hard to pick up the pieces left over from the past, it's harder to chase back the old times.

The time with family, the time with old friends seemed to lessen a great deal all of a sudden.

So the new year has begun, and with it comes new resolutions. It seems that my whole life's been one huge mess, and I've decided it's time to set it right, or at least, clear whatever I can up.

My main priority is to start getting those darn As on my tests and examinations. Yes, I'm gonna study. Hard.

It's time to spend more time with my family, and forge closer relationships. I've no idea how I'm gonna acheive that but I'm gonna try.

To grow mature spiritually, to rise up and serve God, to be closer to Him than I've ever been.

Yes, those are the only resolution I've made and want to keep. Since this year's gonna be my O levels year, time's pretty short, so I've put my priority on these things, things that matter the most to be right now. It's time to buck up and hit the books, it's time to dive into deep seclusion to get those results up.

I'm having a headache, and I've a feeling the reason behind it is school. The pressure's settling in again, I hope I don't give in. I'm gonna pack my bag and dance my way to school tomorrow and I'll have a wide smile on my face and shout hooray.

Blimey. Time to get some sleep.

I'll show you mine if you show me yours first.

Let's compare scars and I'll tell you whose is worse.

Let unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words.

Here's to the nights we felt alive,
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry.
Here's to goodbye,
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon.

To my beloved N293 :

Evan
You're one of the friends in N293 I talked to more. (: The first time we actually talked was after cell group in Kovan, in the mrt and.. you were having another of your mood swings. There was a footprint on the floor and I tried fitting my foot in, and you smiled ! As I've said, you're a really special girl, always being tough and hard on the outside, but you're actually so soft in the inside. (: I find your smile really pretty, so stop having random mood swings and keep smiling ! Well, you're leaving for N330, and I guess we won't meet so much, I'll have one less friend to talk to now. But like you said, there's always Sunday. I'll carry your bag anytime, that is, if you stop listing out the special privileges of your school. Keep the fire burning for Christ, and I'm sure he's probably as in love with your smile as I am. (:

Sandy
Sandy, sandy, oh sandy. (: One of the few who talked to me during my first days in N293 ! I'm really grateful for well, not your bullying, but for how you always talk to me no matter what. I know, life's pretty tough for you right now, but there's always me ! And life's always much more than problems. I'm sorry about the Christmas gift, I'll find something for you I promise. Well, your chattering will go to N330 along with you, and I'll miss it. But come every Sundays, you can bully me all you want, anytime, anywhere. Though regarding the bag carrying service, I shall reconsider. (: So trust in God, and I'm sure everything's gonna be fine really soon ! (:

Joshua, Sarah
Joshua ! You're the little brother I always talk to, be it in church or during cell group meeting. Somehow, you're just so cute that we connect in a special way. I love talking to you, teasing you, playing with you, and things won't be quite the same around in N293 without you. But no matter what, let's stay as close as we are now. (: I'll sit with you whenever you're lonely and you can disturb me whenever you want to. (: Mm, Sarah. We hardly ever talk, or rather, we never did actually talk to one another. But I know the reasons for your tears during thanksgiving and.. All I can say is, God must have a special reason for this. So, uh, mushroom ? ( I wonder why everyone calls you that ) Stay cheerful and have faith ! (:

Sheryln, Wenhui, Jiayu, Szefong
The first four friends I met in N293, during the Festival of Praise, remember ? Well, I dont think anyone of you would come across my humble blog but.. It was great fun knowing you guys. I find the bunch of you as one of the craziest in N293, and the actions and comments you people made never fails to lights up a moody day. The atmosphere won't be the same without you guys, but there are still many outings we can head out together as a cell. Thanks for always talking to me when it seems that I'm always by the side feeling lonely and stuff. I appreciated it. Good luck in N330 ! (:

Nicolette, Derrick, Jicai, Dwayne
Nicolette. (: One of the closer friends in N293, I thank you for the times we've had together. There have been rumours about us, but you're always shrugging them away, and I feel that you're such a carefree person. (: Your wide smile seems to speak everything about you the day we met, and.. Yeah, we've shared pretty much as close friends. I'll always remember you, and if you stop talking to the thousands of boyfriends online and saying mushy stuff to them, I'll consider talking to you more in church. (: Alright, enough talk, study hard, and just know that you can come to me for anything, or if you simply wish to bore me with your voice. (: Derrick and Jicai ! You guys are great fun to hang out with, and would really brave any dangers for your friends. (: Welcome to church and though we would be seperated in different cells, I still hope that you two can come up with as much nonsense on Sundays. Maplestory doesn't actually catches my attention, but your adventures with Jeffery in that imaginary land cracks me up. And Jicai, Manchester United still rocks. (: Dwayne, I supposed you know we would be having bible study together and I hope to know you better as a friend. (: And you should bring Yuqi to church too ! (:

Angeline, Guifeng
The two girls that I find extremely comical when engaging Jeffery in a conversation. The small bits of conversation between us that I actually remembered was when Angeline was afraid to get sweets from the counter and pulled me along, and when Guifeng got bombarded by a gift from the birds in the skies of Sentosa. Keep being yourselves, and I'm sure there would be more of you to recall as the days go on. (:

Anna
The one I find to be someone who's really on fire and filled with passion for God, and yet still being a great friend with a sense of humour. I think that you would be a great leader in the futre and that you're really gifted in music ! I heard you on the piano when we came early, and if I'm not wrong, you were playing 100 years, Five For Fighting. And you're equally good on the guitar, when Jeffery handed you the guitar for you to take over the strings. N293 is proud to have you among us, and continue guiding us along the path to be more like Christ. (:

Hweemin
Hello ! Remember the day I offered you some flowers ? Or rather, the tennis racket that belonged to you. I've no idea why I came up with flowers and not just saying it's a tennis racket. (: I guess that's the only memory I have of you through the days I've been here, but we still talk when we meet and I thank you for always being so friendly to me. (:

Liyun, Liwen
Liyun ! (: Being the most entertaining person in N293 isn't exactly an easy thing to accomplish, and I wonder how you always come up with the silliest actions and words to humour everyone one in the cell. The way you always tease and play with Fiona makes me laugh, and your senseless jokes never fails to make me laugh. Like on the train when we're going to help out at the children church, you were the one making all the really weird but amusing jokes. And you do the weirdest things, like using Fiona's phone and sending me a message to get water for her, when you're just two metres away from me ! Thanks for all the joy and laughter you bring to N293 and keep coming up with amusing stuff. (: Liwen, you're just like your sister, always making everyone smile, but in a different way. The way you make everyone in the cell laugh and feel loved is just really special. And the way you cling to eveyone during thanksgiving was so cute. (: N293 won't be so much fun without you and your sister around. (:

Jeffery
You're the one who brought me to N293 and I thank you for that. You're a friend anyone would love to have, and you're a great brother to me too. We're still together in the same cell group, and in the same class in school. (: And I'm glad that you're always crazy and being the way you are. I thank you and Junle from the bottom of my heart, for the company, and for this great family. (:

Junle
Another of my classmates that I'm close to, and it's no different in church too. I thank you for always talking to me when everyone seemed so busy, and for everything we shared as friends whenever we head out together. You're simply a great brother, and I really thank you for that. (:

Fiona
Fiona ! (: You're someone who taught me so much, and being a great friend to talk to anytime, anywhere. You're really someone so special to me, the way you dont behave like a girl, yet there's something about you that tells me you're as much a girl as any other out there, just so much more special. I'm glad to be your entertainment everytime you're bored, and I'm thankful for the laughter you've brought me. You're just so silly, when your eyes shine so brightly when you see food, and the childish tone in you when you play your Xbox. Keep your hair long, it's really pretty. (: I still can't bear to eat the candy you gave me, and thanks so much for what you gave me during Christmas. Thank you for everything, and thank you for being who you are. (:

Leila
And finally, I've reached.. My wonderful cell group leader, Leila ! Thanks for listening to me spill out my problems, and thanks for making me feel so much at home in N293. I've really nothing more to say, except a big thank you for all you've done for each and every one of us, and that N293 loves you. (:

So denied, so I lied, are you the now or never kind.

In a day and a day love I'm gonna be gone for good again.

Are you willing to be had, are you cool with just tonight.

Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well.

Put your name, on the line, along with place and time.

Wanna stay, not to go, I wanna ditch the logical.

Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well.

All my time is frozen in motion,

Can't I stay for an hour or two or more,

Don't let me let you go.

Here's a toast to all those who know me all too well.

Here's to the nights we felt alive.

Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry.

Here's to goodbye,

Tomorrow's gonna come too soon.

MERRY CHRISTMAS !

To the furthest ends of earth, I wish each and everyone a MERRY CHRISTMAS ! (:

To EVERYONE who gave me something for this wonderful day, be it a simple card or the plentiful sweets and chocolates, I thank you from the bottom of my heart !

To my FAMILY, though it's a simple dinner, I sure enjoyed everything. (:

To the FRIENDS I've always treasured, know that life's all about having great fun with you guys.

To God, thank You for the warmth of a family, though unlike others. For the friends You have placed in my life, they're everything I could ask for. Thank You for a great church to praise and worship You in, and I wish that wherever you are, up in heaven looking down on us, or down on earth prancing around white snow with little children, I wish that You too, have a MERRY CHRISTMAS. (:

Maybe it's childish and maybe it's wrong ,

But so is your blank stare in lieu of this song ;

I got my electric guitar. (:

Everyone say YAYE.

So, I've been playing with my brand new toy for the past hours, and yes, I can safely say I've found my true love. Thing is, Mxtabs had chosen a bad time to shut down on me and all I can do now is to meddle around with my limited knowledge of guitar tabs. But still, I'm overjoyed. (:

Holidays are coming to an end and I've yet to complete my homework. I lost my maths worksheet and I need the question on the composition. And regarding the newspaper cuttings, I've yet to find someone who reads the chinese newspapers daily. So, I guess this spells doom.

On second thoughts, my schoolwork hasn't been exactly outstanding.

I'm breathing in your skin tonight ,

Quiet is my loudest cry ,

Won't wanna wake the eyes that make me melt inside.

I still have not tasted sushi this holidays, and I don't think anyone eats sushi on Christmas.

I wonder why everyone's feeling moody these days. Hello, Christmas is arriving. Chirstmas speaks of joy and laughter. Of white snow, dozens of gifts, the aroma of turkey, and the sight of the grand Christmas tree. (:

Alright, the guitar's beckoning. I'm off. Goodbye.

I'll send you the rough draft, I'll seal it with tears.

And I'm still waiting for ,
You to be the one I'm waiting for ;

Days seem to crawl and fly, at the same time, that is. At home, it's pretty much a mess, and with the hangover of Additional Mathemactics in my head, together with the frequent quarrels, you get my point. Home isn't exactly a good place to be in during the holidays. And when you just wanna take a break form everything, you run into the room and hide under the pillow. Now, that's when the thoughts of school come in. Three more weeks and school's reopening. And no, I haven't done my homework yet.

These days in God's presence were really, really comforting. I can't explain it, and even if I did, few would understand. I just wanna thank God for everything He did. I know, everything would be just fine. (:

I'm heading out to run some errands. Goodbye.

And the sun still shines in the summer time ,
I'll be yours if you'll be mine ;

It's 2am in the morning.

I watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire today. As a movie, it's well, pretty good. But as one who reads and follows every single book, it's somewhat average. But who am I to judge it, cause no matter the quality, this movie still makes big bucks.

I miss Eve and Amadea, and the days spent studying. Awesome fun.

Think I'll have another glass of Mexican wine.

Mexican wine's constantly playing in my head these few days. After strolling by the wine cellar in the supermarket, I've this sudden urge to taste wine. Or champagne. Oh, one more thing. The way the wine bottles are arranged on the self, one knock and you'll find yourself forking out thousands of dollars paying for broken glass. The supermarket's so crafty, be careful around that area. (:

I'm desperately in need of new albums, I can't wait to get my pay. Then I'll spend and spend and spend. Speaking of which, I haven't been working for two weeks. (: That means I have to cut short my own Christmas list, unfaaair.

Yawn. Goodnight.